Personality Testimony

Published by Angela | Filed under Personalities

In 1983 I was going through a hormonal depression.  My goals had been thwarted by an unplanned pregnancy, life was no fun because I spent most of my day sick and at home. I felt like a mess.  I had spent most of my life comparing myself with others and usually came up “wanting.”  Too loud, too opinionated, cared too much, too bold, too intense,  and the list goes on. Too much or not enough of something.   It just seemed like there was something wrong with me.

 A lady in the church had just moved from California and she was going through a depression too.  She gave me the book Personality Plus signed by Florence Littauer.  As I read it I laughed and cried.  For the first time I realized that there wasn’t something wrong with me. I just wasn’t a Perfectly organized, scheduled, sensitive, quietly reserved Melancholy.  I definitely was not a calm, cool, collected Peaceful Phlegmatic.  I was a Choleric/Sanguine and it was okay to be me. 

 It was as if a weight had been lifted from my soul.  I wish I could say that I accepted my personality right away but I didn’t.  Cholerics are not popular.  It took me a few years but it started me on my journey to wholeness and my identity in Christ.

In 1987 I went through another depression but this one was not hormonal; it was a spiritual surgery.  I had stuffed the pain of abuse and was oblivious to the cloak of shame that shrouded my spirit and soul.  The surgery took a year of sitting at the feet of Jesus, searching the Word, worshipping at the piano, saying the name of Jesus.  I had lost my smile and didn’t know what was wrong with me but I was leaning on the Lord and underneath me were his everlasting arms. 

I soaked my mind and heart in Romans 3-8, Ephesians and Colossians.  One morning when I knelt to pray and journal I suddenly  “got it.”  The light bulb came on and I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that I was “accepted in the beloved.”  Others may never accept me as a Choleric/Sanguine    but I am totally and unconditionally loved and accepted by the one who knows me best – my heavenly Father.  I never felt accepted by my own father so this was especially comforting to me.

Not long after that God supernaturally orchestrated a friend to ask me out to coffee.  It was a Phlegmatic friend who was very good at listening and being quiet.  I poured my heart out to her for forty five minutes. Then out of no where I started sharing about my abuse, the pain and the shame.  Freedom came almost immediately and has kept coming in waves of His grace. 

To make a long story short, knowing the personalities was a tool that opened my mind to know, accept and celebrate who I am.  Knowing my identity in Christ has defeated the giant of shame.  I’m no longer in a row boat, up the creek without a paddle but I’m a majestic Tall ship sailing the uncharted seas of life with confidence.  The ship’s keel is weighted with my knowledge of the Word, the Masts are lifted high by faith and are holding the sails of my identity in Christ.  The Holy Spirit blows on the sails empowering me to navigate the stormy, rough waters or calm breezes of life. 

I’m no longer tossed to and fro by the opinions of people –I’m anchored in the Word.  I’m a Powerful Choleric submitted to the control of the Holy Spirit and I’m a Popular Sanguine cheering others on to become all God has designed them to be – Uniquely His